Tuesday, May 29, 2012

If only life was like Jeopardy

And we had the answers to our questions before we knew what the question was... but that's not the case.

Answers don't come until they're meant to and that can be hard to accept.

I've received some answers to prayers recently and I am SO grateful for them.

I know what I need to do and what steps I need to take to get better.

The two biggest things I need to do to help myself get over all my issues is to get rid of my IUD and then to also start seeing a therapist.  

My IUD - I had no idea that Mirena could trigger depression but after a quick google search, this is what I've found...

Uh... I can tell you right when my depression started... We thought it was postpartum, but it was about the time Mad-dog was 3 months old... and I had my IUD inserted.  DUH! I've struggled with it since then. Me and Handsome have talked about it numerous times thinking it was coincidence and maybe I should have it removed just to see... This past weekend, with the issues I've been having (more on that later, I'm going to the doc today to get answers and I'll post once we know more on what's up with my body) I feel like we have previously been prompted that this is a cause... now it's like I'm being shoved to have it removed. So out it's gonna come!

And the therapist... obviously I struggled with depression long before I had my IUD inserted and most of them come from things that happened to me in the past. I need to see someone who can give me the tools to move on and forget... or to atleast adjust better. I have a tendency (more like consistency) to judge myself too harshly. I need someone to help me learn to think better... So I'm going to set up an appointment today to see someone.  For those who are LDS, I'm going to be using the church services to try and find someone. That way they'll understand how my faith and standards fit in to all this. 

Anyways - I now have the motivation I need to move past this, to get well and and go from being the bad kinda crazy to the bad ass kinda crazy. Here's to hoping the answers I found are the right ones!

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